That was the fatal moment in which Jimbob McDunclugrocks was savagely mauled by the Black Arm of Snargle, in what The Daily Warthog counts as the thirteenth attack in so many days.
“At least 1000 people have now been claimed in Northern Ireland’s Jordanstown area”, our correspondant states. “Tens of thousands of pinapple chunks have been deployed in the rugged terrain to appease the Arm for now. But it’s only a matter of time before some innocent bycicler gets hammered on his way home from uni”.
If you have any information about the whereabouts of the Black Arm, run like feck and hope he doesn’t notice you.
that was the day that was - like a lamb to the slaughter I was. I was just cycling along all casual like, and then BOOM! next thing I know I’m scraping myself off the Cregagh Rd and being heranged by old ladies wanting to help me. I learnt a valuable lesson that day - don’t Fuck with the arm.